Telling My Family About This Lifestyle Change

When I finally decided that minimalism is something I needed in my life, I did not tell anyone.  I started a silent journey of cleaning out.  Several times per year I always go through the kids’ closets as well as my own.  My husband didn’t even notice.  The donation center got to know my car quickly and would always send more than one person out to unload.  Hubby’s first inclination was when I loaded down his old suburban to the max.  The windows were all blocked. You could not cram another thing in the back of that truck!  I pulled away from the donation center and all I could think was “OH MY GOSH!! WHAT DID I JUST DO??”  That feeling immediately gave way to pure excitement, thankfulness, and peace.  It was exhilarating.  I knew that I needed to have “the talk” about what I was up to.  

Future Plans

Shortly after, we were in the car discussing where our lives were headed in the next few years.  We talked about everything but what I needed to say.  I was chicken.  What was he going to say? What would he think? Have I totally lost my mind?  Finally, I just blurted out that over the next year, I wanted to become a minimalist.  **Enter side-eye and crazy look.**  “You want to be what? Why?”  

I tried to explain what minimalism was and how much better I already felt after letting go of some things.  He heard “minimalism” and just shut off.  The word was like a swear word to his ears.  He said, “Why do you have to call it that, why do you have to label it?”  Because it makes it definite.  Calling it “minimalism” gives it definition and meaning.  It sets the end goal and marks the beginning of the process.  

The Feelings

Honestly, my feelings were super hurt.  I wanted him to be on board and all about it too.  He was very passionate about wanting to keep his stuff.  I made sure he knew that I would not touch his things.  However, I would be going through the kids and my possessions.  That was an acceptable truce.  We set boundaries for his “places” that were safe from purging.  

I was determined not to let that stop my progress or journey.  This was the answer to my overwhelmed mom life.  It is okay that my Hubby is not completely on board.  He is super supportive and I know that in time, he may choose to go through his things.  If he never does, that is fine too.  Fewer items in all other areas make upkeep so much better, faster, easier, and less stressful.  His things do not make or break the progress everywhere else.

Telling another family member went about the same.  Although, I never completely outed myself.  I told them my idea to start this website.  They asked what I was going to talk about. “Minimalism.” Crickets.  Not the response I was hoping for but, okay.  

I did get overwhelming support from some friends and family, which helped me feel like I wasn’t completely crazy!  I was searching for validation for this new lifestyle change.

Truth Bomb

The truth is that it does not matter.  I don’t care who approves or disapproves of this life I am choosing.  This is for me.  This is for my children.  This frees my mind and spirit to be the mom and person I aspire to be.  Who cares what they really think? I have to look at myself in the mirror.  

I feel like I have discovered this amazing secret and want to share it with the world!  As women, as moms, as humans, we spend so much time seeking the approval of what other people think of our choices.  We worry what they will think or say so much that we have silenced our own inner voice that guides us.  I’m here to tell you, friend, that voice is worth listening to.  Believe in yourself, in your instincts, in your ability to do what is best for yourself and your family.  Listen to that small voice.

I couldn’t even hear that voice anymore.  It was hidden in my clutter.  When I finally heard it again, I listened. I intend to keep listening too. The further I have gone in decluttering my home, mind, and calendar, the louder that voice is becoming.  I am starting to find that place in my own head that is peaceful.  

I am finding a person who is fun, energetic, and present.  There is a woman inside of me who enjoys motherhood and has time to play on the floor with her kids.  I am beginning to find self-love and worth.  I am finding a life of wonder and abundance.  Isn’t that how we were called to live? Who would have thought all of those things came from simplification and minimalism?